When Time Stops
by RileyStorm12
Summary: South Fanfic... A little different... Don't wanna say too much... So give it a try :


**Ok… so I could spend about a month's worth of fanfiction space trying to explain why I've been on hiatus for these past months. Let's just leave it simple… I've been extremely ill and life has tried it's best to keep me down. I am however back now with tons of recovery time on my hands, so thank you to those who are taking the time to read this new fanfiction I've started. I know I should probably finish the other one first, and I WILL finish it, but I really need something fresh to occupy my mind and I thought you guys might take an interest in the angle I'm writing from in this one. So if you have the time, check it out… and it would be great to get some feedback to give me an idea of whether to continue or not… So here you guys go… Thanks again for the support.**

**Chapter One – The Five Aspects of Life**

After twenty long years living in NYC, there's really only one thing that I'm sure of. Well, one philosophy rather. Life can be pretty much wrapped up into five categories. There's your past… the present… your future… your battle… and I guess love or something like that. Think I'm crazy? Join the group… but before you begin to judge… let me explain.

People always say that your past doesn't define you… What you've been through doesn't tell who you are. It's more important how you dealt with the cards you were handed. I guess in a way, that's true. But I personally think it's rather impressive to just have survived it. To be honest… I don't really give a shit that you held your head high through it all; I'm impressed that your head is still attached. However, this is coming from a girl that can't find her own head most of the time; go figure.

The present. What hand is life laying on the table at this point in your life? How much of the present is a direct result of your past? Are you happy where you are? Because see, the way I look at it, there are two things in life you shouldn't worry about. That's yesterday and tomorrow… because you can't control those things. You have to worry about this moment… right now… but time won't stop. Not for anyone. Which brings me to the next aspect of life through the eyes of Mandy Musgrave.

There's your future, your dreams. Where you aspire to be later and what you have to do to get there. In my opinion… your dreams have the ability to expose your heart more than anything else. If you have dreams, you must have some sort of faith. I think that's all any of us need. It's not so much important WHAT you believe in. I think it's just important to believe in something.

Then of course, there are the battles. Maybe some people don't realize it, but we each fight two battles every single day. We fight the battle between our heart and our head. Which one you find yourself listening to… now that is the ultimate defining factor in a person. Now for the second battle. The one where what we feel on the inside is dying to get out. But we are human. And human nature is to put everything we have into hiding the important parts of ourselves; hoping that someday, someone will come along that cares enough about you to break down those walls. In a sense… breaking you only to put you back together again. I think that's all any of us want.

Love. The L word. But what does that even mean? I'm not sure. I know I sure as hell have never felt it. I mean… I love my parents… I love my sister, who is simply amazing if you must know. But I mean, isn't that a requirement? Do you even have a choice as to whether or not you love your family? I don't think so. That's not the love I'm talking about. I'm talking about meeting someone for the first time and being interested enough in spending the time and energy to get to know them. I'm talking about that interest turning into something a little more. Turning in to thinking about them more than normal. Maybe even caring if they are having a good day.

I don't think I've even once gotten close enough to someone outside of my little family in Pensacola, FL to even contemplate calling to check on a friend and see how their day is going. Is that normal? Does everyone have a wall up this high or have I just lost it.

"Ugh." Ok… so that was out loud. I glance around to see Janice stick her head out from behind her cubicle to give me a dirty look. Yep, that's me. The girl who gets so into her own thoughts that she grunts aloud in the middle of a dead silent office. Think that's sad? Yea, well try being around when I start answering the questions in my head out loud.

I look at the clock only to discover that I have officially sat here five minutes longer than I had to. After quickly shutting my computer down and grabbing my coat, I'm out the door.

It's a little colder now than it was when I walked into work at 8 this morning. I guess I should have expected it but the cold air seems to always make me catch my breath. Most people don't know this, but I absolutely hate the cold weather. I despise it with everything in me. I guess you could say that it's a part of my present that's directly related to my past; however, I refuse to let my mind go there.

I will however let my mind roll over the present. I'm twenty years old. I've been living in NYC for almost two years now, and my acting career is going nowhere. I guess you could say that's my dream. Ha. Funny right? Small town girl from FL wants to be an actress. Yea. I know. But at least I'm dreaming right? I have also remained remarkably invisible to everyone outside of the people I work with; and most of the time, I don't think they see me either. Well, they don't see me unless I'm grunting or answering my questions aloud.

The only person I talk to daily is my sister, Jamie. Every day when I get home from work, I sign on to AIM just to talk to her. See, she's deaf, so we communicate using sign over webcam. I guess you could say she's my best friend. Can't really lose that, no matter what the conditions or how many miles are in between. The rest of my time outside of work is spent e-mailing and sending tapes to directors of upcoming projects I'm interested in. I've done a few commercials as well as worked on a few scripts that made it; but I'm not anywhere near where I want to be.

Ahh. Here I am. My little hole in the wall. I fumble with my keys for far too long to have done this the thousands of nights before. When I finally do make it inside my building, I'm met with the familiar smell that tends to keep me up at night. One of the many things about this city that has yet to grow on me. I clumsily throw my things on the sofa and open the laptop that hasn't moved since this morning only to be disappointed when my sister Jamie's screen name is absent from my buddy list.

"Damn, what the hell is she doing?" I say aloud. Hey… no one is here to make fun of me! I pay for this dump… I can talk to myself if I want.

It was when I reached over to grab the remote that Will Smith's voice bellowed from my computer. "Hey yo… you have new messages!" After almost jumping out of my skin, I burst out laughing at the child-like setting I'd yet to change on my computer. A piece of home I guess I couldn't quite let go of just yet.

The first one was from Jamie.

_Hey you! I guess by now you've realized that I'm not going to be able to meet our little Instant Message date tonight.  I have a date with the new guy. And yes, you will be filled in with every last detail as soon as I make it home. Wish me luck sis and stay safe! Love you like rain,_

_Jamie_

I've never been able to hold the smile that comes along with hearing from home. God how I miss them. Even the over-used expression in our family, 'love you like rain', makes water betray my eyes. Ugh… ok … moving on from the fact that my deaf sister has a better social life than me. I exit the window and focus on the second message in my inbox.

There are far too many moments in life that mean nothing at all. They are just simply that. Moments. Time passing. They have no effect on your life whatsoever. But then there are some, few and far between, that change everything. It's like you've been facing a blank wall your whole life, asking all of these questions, with all of the answers right behind you. And then this moment occurs. And it's like life grabs you by the shoulders and slings you around to face the world.

Now whether you like what you discover or not… who knows. But it's life changing. Nothing is ever the same after that moment. I guess you could say I can feel that moment approaching. Every philosophy I have about life is about to be tested. I'm about to be tested. Life is about to begin. I just have to turn around.

_From: Tom Lynch Company_ Subject: South of Nowhere

**Ok so I know it's a weird angle, but I haven't read one like it yet, so I thought it would be cool to do something a little different. It's also a little short, but I want to see what you guys think before I get too into it. Feedback including opinions would be amazing. Hope to hear from you all soon. Thanks and Love, Riley.**


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